Ibiza Ibiza Ibiza!

 

So as the summer season begins in one of the top party destinations in the World, Ibiza, we'll tell you about one of our experiences over there.

Day 1 (Thursday) After booking our flights in January at dirt cheap prices, British Airways £181 return from Heathrow (I'm just saying) we were finally off to Ibiza. 7 months of talking about Ibiza, 7 months of occasional shopping for Ibiza, 7 months of gym training, 7 months of reading this forum for hints and tips, it was now time to head to the airport. I and four other mates all arrive at Heathrow dead on time. It was a pretty straight forward journey, no dramas, no delays, it was all good. We boarded the aircraft, and I was very pleased not to be sitting at the back with a bunch of idiots. You know the type of people I’m talking about. We thought by flying with BA we would avoid all the ‘idiots’. Sadly not, the idiots are catching on to flying with BA and not with Ryanair or EasyJet. They must have booked at the same time as me to get the best deal. Luckily I had my headphones and iPad mini. I had season 2 of “DareDevil” that I still needed to get through. I totally missed the in-flight meal as I was not looking up from my iPad. You would think the air hostess would give me a little nudge, but no. Anyway, they were serving couscous so glad I missed it.

We arrive in Ibiza where to no surprise the sun was blazing hot, which was a welcome after the nonsense weather back home in England. The bus to San Antonio was every 60 minutes, so we jumped into two cabs and arrived at our hotel 25 minutes later. We had a female taxi driver, however, she smelt like a sweaty man. Not a good look. We stayed at the Marina Playa. For me, self-catering is the way forward. The location was good, just on the bay, which is about 5 minute walk from the Ocean Beach. The hotel/apartment was clean and the staff were very friendly. I did have a small problem with ants, but as soon as I mentioned it, it was sorted. We dropped our bags and went to the supermarket to stock up on supplies. Pure protein, veg and fruit, minimal carbs if any at all. I did buy some bread, but that was just to soak up the alcohol after a night out.

After a quick shit, shower, shave (not necessarily in that order), we meet up with our 6th member, who was the oldest, which was great as that didn’t make me the eldest. He was staying in a hotel just down the road, Hotel San Reno I believe. We had a few drinks in our hotel, and then hit the strip. We thought we would just ease ourselves into Ibiza as we had a very demanding schedule, I guess hitting the strip is not the way to do it. The strip is what it is, you can have some of your best nights on the strip. Personally I think it's a vile area, maybe it would not be so bad if it was a bit more multicultural and not just littered with silly drunk idiots.

Anyway, after I got drunk, I turned into one of those silly idiots, we danced all night to commercial music in the 70's 80's 90's bar and the occasional trip across the strip to Soul City. I eventually lost everyone and I didn’t have any Wi-Fi or cellular activity, as I refused to bow to Vodafone's extortionate prices when travelling abroad, so I thought I'd go it alone. It was supposed to be a gentle night, however, I had consumed far too much alcohol and was still buzzing. I used my great Ibiza west end knowledge to think where would be kicking at 5.30 am, and then I remembered that a venue called Hush should still be busy. So I headed over and as soon as I'm about to enter, one of my mates comes stumbling out, literally fighting his way out. He sees me, and greets me with a hug (a man hug of course), he says, forget Hush, it's a sausage fest (man talk for a lot of men in a venue). We decided, right it's time for some food and thought we would posh it up and get some KFC. Then we find two more of our mates, however there is nowhere decent to go. We get chatting to these two chicks, one was very attractive, the other wasn’t as attractive. Funnily enough it was the not so attractive one that was up for some kind of ‘an alone party’, to which we all said, no thanks but in a very polite way of course. I just told her I have a long term partner who’s also on the island. Nothing wrong with a little creative bending of the truth. Anyway, we escaped the beast’s claws and decided to call it a night. Back to the Marina Playa we go.

 
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Did you hear the one about the promoter and the pokémon go? nah